Accidental Hedonist

Starting on January 1, customers that visit Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, KFC, Long John Silver’s or A&W Restaurants can obtain a free, four-week membership from Bally Total Fitness by simply presenting a proof-of-purchase receipt (for any amount) at one of Bally’s more than 400 nationwide facilities. The offer is valid through January 31, 2005.

The reason this is getting a lot of news is the incongruity of a fitness company doing business with the proprieters of unhealthy eating, fast food companies. It’s akin to Phillip Morris giving coupons to the local cancer clinic.

Personally, I’m not sure what to think about this. Anything that gets people out of the house and into some sort of activity is a good thing, even if the health club is the mega-coporation that is Bally’s (and just to remind you, Bally’s is hardly a stand-up corporate citizen, with a fair amount of their profits coming from gambling institutions).

But we are talking about fast food companies, who rarely have people’s health in mind. I mean c’mon, nobody think Long John Silver’s is cooking up anything healthy when 90% of their product line is deep-fried. That’s their nature. For them to go “Well, yeah, I guess we’re kinda unhealthy…perhaps we should do something about it” is an admission of sorts just how unhealthy their foods are.

Regardless, I would be interested to see who benefits more from this agreement. My guess? The fast food places get a short term gain, while Bally’s gets a long term benefit by signing up people for memberships that a percentage of the customers will never use.

When we talk about the food timeline…and we here at Accidental Hedonist do…Beans are part of a weird coincidence in food history. The Old World (Europe, Asia and Africa) domesticated beans roughly the same time as the New World (North and South America). The Faba Bean (or Fava Bean in some circles) was widely cultivated in Egypt, Greece and Rome (6500 BC to 0AD) while in our neck of the woods.

Meanwhile, in what is now Guatemala, the bane of youths worldwide was being domesticated and cultivated around 6500-6000BC…And yes, I’m talking about the lima bean.

It’s one of the odd coincidences that you find from time to time in history. Like the Pyramids at Luxor and the ones found in Central American. Some folks think that aliens had something to do with the pyramid coincidence, perhaps they had something to do with beans as well.

Okay, probably not.

Back to Faba Beans…interesting fact here: It is said that Greek philosopher Pythagoras refused to walk through fields of faba beans. His fear was so intense that he even forbade his disciples to eat them. Legand has it that Pythagoras met his death at the hands of the people of Crotonia in Ancient Bratium (Italy). Pursued by them, he came to the edge of a bean field and, rather than set foot in it, was caught and killed.

Of course, what this speculation of Pythagoras bean phobia comes from his advice of “Abstain from beans” (kyamon apechete). But when one realizes that beans, black and white, were, according to this interpretation, the means of voting in Pythagoras’ hometown. “Abstain from beans” may then mean merely “Avoid politics”. And the myth of of his death may be exactly that…a myth.

So beans are the next topic we’ll be covering here. And we’ll see just how much more aliens and phobias will be discussed.

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Pictured here with a side of Pasta with Walnut sauce and Green Beans with Pancetta, the Pork Fillets sit glistening in the kitchen lights. This Italian dish (called Fettine di maiale con salsa di capperi) ended up being better than I imagined. If you want to get specific on where in Italy this dish originates from, I’d say Northern Italy. You can tell by the fact the recipe calls for butter AND olive oil. If it was a southern Italy dish, it would simply have olive oil.

Be sure to like the tartness that the vinegars bring, as they are the primary taste source within the sauce (even more than the capers). The sauce has one of my favorite bases, with onions, anchovies, and capers.

For the Sauce:

• 2 Tbsp olive oil
• 1/4 cup butter
• 1/2 yellow onion, diced
• 1 anchovy fillet
• 1 Tbsp flour
• 2 Tbsps capers, rinsed
• 1 Tbsp chopped parley
• 4 Tbsp white wine vinegar
• 4 Tbsp water
• 4 Tbsp balsamic vinegar
• 1 tsp lemon zest

For the Meat:

• 1 lb thinly cut pork fillets
• 2 cups of APF flour
• ground pepper, to taste
• 2 Tbsp unsalted butter
• 2 Tbsp olive oil

In a sauce pan, melt together the 1/4 cup of butter with the olive oil. When it starts to foam, add the onion, and cook until nearly translucent. Add the anchovy, stirring it until it dissolves into the onions and butter.

Add the flour to the onion butter sauce. When fully incorporated, add the capers, parsley, the vinegars and the water. Allow to thicken, and finally add the lemon zest. Set on low heat as you turn your attention to the meat. Stir occasionally.

Take out the pork fillets and dry with a paper towel. Stick between two sheets of saran wrap (dish towels will also work)and flatten with a meat pounder.

In a mixing bowl, combine flour and pepper. Dredge pork fillets in flour and shake off any excess. Set aside on a plate.

Place a skillet over medium high heat. Heat 2 Tbsp of butter with 2 Tbsp of oil. When hot, add the pork slices, browning on both sides, roughly 3 minutes a side. When complete, plate and top with Caper sauce.

Serves 4-6

After I took a few jabs at the tradition of egg nog a few days ago, I figured I better have some basis in fact on which I could display my sardonic gen-x attitude. Because, you know, it’s the holiday season and all. Never let it be said that I am not a giver.

Over there in the picture, you see three seperate glasses of egg nog. One home made, one made for vegans (made of soy and other non animal by-products) and one store-bought brand. All have rum added to them.

It was my job to taste test all three. The things I do for science.

The results? It didn’t come close. If you like Egg Flavored cream drinks chock full o’ spirits, make your own. The soy brand tasted only slightly like egg nog, rather tasting more like nutmeg infused soy milk with a slight chemical eggy taste underneath it. The store-bought brand tasted like paste. Paste and nutmeg. Paste, nutmeg and whey powder.

And all had lots o’ rum in them. Because if your drinking egg nog, my advice is to get drunk. That way you have an excuse. “Really, I was only drinking the nog to get plastered!”

So is you must have egg nog this season, make your own. Really, it’s kinda worth it.

• 4 eggs
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/2 cup white rum
• 1 1/2 cups whole milk
• 1 1/2 cups whiskey
• 1 cup heavy cream
• Pinch o’ nutmeg

Seperate the eggs, putting yolks in one bowl, and egg whites in another larger mixing bowl. Combine 1/4 cups of sugar with the egg yolks and mix well.

Using a beater or hand mixer, bring the egg whites to stiff peaks and slowly folks in remaining amounts of sugar. Once the sugar is fully incorporated, slowly fold in the egg yolk mixture in with the egg whites.

Slowly drizzle rum into the egg mixture, incorporating it fully into egg nog mixture. Once all the rum has been added, start pouring the milk in slowly, stirring it in carefully. After milk, add the whiskey in the same manner.

Add 1/2 cup of the heavy cream to the egg nog mixture, slowly folding it in. In a seperate bowl, pour the remaing heavy cream and beat until thickened. Pour 1/2 cup of the egg nog mixture into the whipped cream, slowly folding it into the stiffened cream. Take the whipped cream mixture and pour it into the egg nog mixture and mixing it slowly but thoroughly.

Pour egg nog mixture into pitcher of your choice, and chill for at least three hours. Ladle into cup for drinking and top with nutmeg.

And yes, this is a grown-up drink. This is what egg nog should taste like.

But it still should be only drunk once a year. Happy Holidays!

Serves 8

It was pointed out to me in the comments that there are those who actually like …ahem…fruitcake.

To these people I can only offer a quizical glance, a stare of disbelief, and a shake of the head. Could I be wrong? Perhaps I’ve been given bad fruitcakes all of my life, with the hard cherries (sometime colored a lime green) and the heavy weight of the cake.

Is it because a monkey didn’t make it for me?

is it because I’ve never had it made by Monks?

Is it because I’ve never had it coated with Marzipan?

I’m not sure, but I now get the sense that I’m missing out on something. So I do what I always do…I research.

Over at hungrymonster, they state that fruitcakes were made to celebrate the nut harvests. The write:

After the harvest was complete, they mixed a whole bunch of nuts from the harvest together and made a fruitcake that they SAVED until the harvest the NEXT year. That next year, they chowed down on the old fruitcake, hoping it would bring them another successful harvest.

Yup, they would hold on to the fruitcake for ONE ENTIRE YEAR, before eating it. How appetizing!

I’m sure that many people found, in the year between making an eating, that the cake would evolve into a wonderous cure for social diseases, but be rather unappetizing to look at. So, in order to preserve the cake, they doused it in the food sterlizer of choice…brandy. I’m all for brandy. In fact, I am bold enough to say that if you want to send me a fruitcake, you can cut out the middleman and simply send me a bottle of brandy. I’m gracious like that.

But how did it get associated with Christmas? For that, we have the Victorians to thank, who often handed out slices of the cake to the poor women who sang Christmas carols in the street during the late 1700′s. I’m not sure if by “poor women” they mean those lacking in wealth, or they were “poor” because some thoughtless sod gave them a slice of fruitcake, as in “Poor woman, they just gave her a piece of year old nut bread doused in honey and brandy”.

Whatever the history, it’s safe to say that I have yet to have a good fruitcake. But if someone is willing to send me one to try, I’ll be a good sport and taste test the bad boys.

Even if it is made by a monkey.

Back in March of this year, the BBC Food folks asked people to submit foods that should be tried before one leaves their mortal coil.

Well, the list is out…and being a huge fan of lists, I thought it was worth sharing.

Some of the responses are a bit odd as the foods can be as specific as cream tea (no. 19) or as vague as greek food (no. 25). Add the list is very British, where they “ooo” and “ahh” over foods that we yanks take for granted (Mexican Food and scallops).

The scary part is that I’ve eaten all but 9 of the items. I wonder if I were to complete the list,if my time here is done.