Do I even attempt to broach the subject that some might consider ‘beneath’ a foodie? Do I dare speak the three words that strike fear into the hearts of parents across the country?
Those three words? “Girl Scout Cookies“
It is indeed that time of year again, when co-workers hit the rest of us with guilt trips in order to help their daughters earn a future-capitalist badge. E-mails will fly back and forth with desperate pleas for orders and calls for one last box of trefoils. This year, many young girls will have nightmares of “Did I sell enough boxes?”
Why? So we can all get our fix of Thin Mints.
Full disclosure here. I have never been (and suppose, never will be) a girl scout. I opted out when I realized that they didn’t give badges for bon mots and sarcastic attitudes. However, my goodie-two-shoes sisters were girl scouts and I recall vividly the easter colored boxes stored in our pantry, waiting for our next visit to our grandparents who ordered far more cookies than most 70-year-olds eat in a given year.
The Green Army of Girls have been selling cookies since 1917, but the commercial boxes of cookies didn’t arrive until 1934 when the greater Philadelphia Girl Scout council became the first regional council to sell commercially baked cookies. But even that wasn’t the watershed year for Girl Scout Cookies.
No, the year I celebrate in regards to girl scout cookies is 1951 when Thin Mints were introduced.
Ah yes, thin mints…my old archnemesis. You are my Achilles heal. I have a severe love/hate relationship with you.
Let’s be honest here for a moment. If it weren’t for thin mints (and to a lesser extent Samoas…which, for the record, remind me nothing of the island nation that is its namesake), we wouldn’t even be talking about girl scout cookies. We all know in our heart of hearts that these two cookies are the money makers for the Girl Scouts (1 out of every four boxes of Girl Scout Cookies sold are Thin Mints). The rest of their cookie catalog is barely Keebler elf quality.
But Thin Mints? Oh how I love thee. Especially after you’ve been kept in the freezer for a day or two. I don’t care that your now $4 a box. If you were given as communion instead of whatever the hell they’re passing off as teh body of Christ, I’d be a practicing Catholic.
What I don’t love about you is the fact that there are close to 36+ cookies in a pack, and the suggested serving is only 4 cookies (at 140 calories per serving).
I’m not the only one who has issues with Girl Scout Cookies. A woman in Albuquerque was sued over $1400 for collection of these baked pieces of gold. The suit contends the woman â??refused to payâ? and characterizes her actions as â??embezzlement of the cookies.â?
$1400 comes to 350 boxes. I wonder how many of them were Thin Mints.
At any rate, track down a co-worker selling cookies for their daughters. They should be easy to spot, as they have the “I’m-helping-my-daughter-but-boy-do-I-wish-I-was-doing-somthing-else” look in their eye. Make their life easier by purchasing a box or two.